23 April 2016

Hospital dialogue

Late evening. Male care assistant in his 20s/30s, of Asian appearance; male patient, white, in his late 80s. The names have been changed.

Bill, I need to take your temperature and blood pressure.
Must you?
Yes, Bill, I must.
Very well, then.
[pause]
What's your name?
My name's Shamoon. Give me your arm now.
Where are you from?
I beg your pardon?
Where are you from, where were you born?
England.
What's that? I can't hear you.
England. I was born in England.
Oh, I see.
[pause]
Only ... I asked because ...
Yeah?
You look a bit ... Indian. I don't mean Indian as in cowboys and Indians, I mean from India.
Yeah?
That's what I meant.
So what's that got to do with anything?
Uh.
[pause]
So what's my blood pressure, then?
Is normal. OK.
Ah, that's good. So I'm not dead yet, ha ha.
Yeah, Bill, you're talking a load of rubbish, that means you're still alive.

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